Talkin' about a Blog Swap!

Hello Friends! I have a real treat for you today...it's the Happenings' very first guest post. And it's from a pretty awesome little lady, my friend Janette! We swapped blogs today, so while she is entertaining you fine folks here, I'll be over in her little corner of the internet talking about some things I wish I knew before I became a mother! Enjoy her fabulous & amazing post...coming all the way to you from Jongleurville.
Bonjour Ashleylanders! Janette the Jongleur here! A girl that is undeniably delighted to be taking over the glory that is Hudson’s Happenings for a day. (Nervous!? I AM!) Just like you, I’m a fan of the dapper and destined-to-be-charmer, Hudsy and his ever-dazzling momma (Is Ash a prettypie or what?). I’m also a fan of blogging, ice crunching, thrifting and a great many other things…like mangos. But today, I’m here to talk about marriage. Yes, I’m also a long-haired lass married to my much adored hubaloo, Lovey.  I’ve been the blissful Mrs. Lovey for 2 years…going on 3! I’m here today to share 5 things of the wedded sort… And just a side note, before I begin, your beloved Ashley is safe and sound...In fact, she's over in Jongleurville doing a post on 5 things of the motherly sort...So go check her out there if you please...

Disclaimer alert!!!  I’m not here to dissuade anyone from marriage. Nor do I regret getting married (I realize the title of my exposition implies otherwise) I’m here to just share some essential things I wish someone would have told me…A virtual headsup, if you will…

I have 2 sets of in-laws…and that is probably the case for many couples nowadays. With this comes double the trouble (potentially). Yes, you do marry his family too…So please consider this and make sure you get along with his siblings, parents, AND his Uncle Steve who likes touching your long hair when in close proximity. (Can you say "awkward central"?!) But in all seriousness... There are many times Lovey and I feel stretched with familial obligations, holidays, weekly visits, sports games..etc. There are 40 of them and 2 of us…But I hold to the wise words of Paul the Apostle, "Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone." (Romans 12:18) So try to get along.

There exists a slight, unspoken rift between the married and unmarried. A few months back, I received a call from a (girl)friend who wanted the phone number of a mutual friend… She said she needed a “single girl” to talk to. One “who would understand what I’m going through”. At this point, I realized that I was of a different species. The Married Species! Did my friend forget that I was single (for years) before I was married? Perhaps this has happened to other married ladies and their single friends…Can you relate?

Love Languages exist! I’m not one to readily give credence to many things, but I really do believe these "Languages" are real (to an extent). And apparently, Lovey speaks Cuddle. He always wants to have me nearby. He feels loved and safe. I’m still learning cause I'm not much of a cuddle machine! I lean more toward the language of  “Help Me in the Kitchen without Being Asked”. (These aren’t the names of the different Love Languages, but you catch my drift.) What's your Love Language?

If I had $1 for every time these following questions were (and are asked) I would currently be on Jongleurtonia (my dream, private island near Fiji) living in an over-water bungalow, sipping on a mango smoothie...Yuppers! You will get asked the following (It's unavoidable!):
Question 1: "How's married life?"
Question 2: "So...When are you guys having kids?"
Answer to 1: Uh... good?
Answer to 2: Uh...I might be barren. Thanks for reminding me.
Oh boy! I don't mind the questions. I really don't...But maybe I can be asked something a little more original. like "What traditions have you started since your first day of wedded bliss?" Or "What's your favorite thing about married life?" "Least favorite?" (Isn't that much better?)

Marriage is about molding and shaping two separate lives into one. I love my hubaloo. I love our life together...  (Notice I didn't say "love our lives together..."). Our hearts and souls are intertwined in an ethereal way that confounds and only God can fully explain.  We are one. We are Mr. & Mrs. Lovey...till death do us part...And that's incredible to me. Seriously, someone should have told me!

Thanks for reading!


Janette said...

LAUGH OUT LOUUUUUUDDDD! That video was guh-reaaattt! WOOWOOWOWOWOWOW! Love that song! What's the title? Totally buying it! And thanks again for guestin' in Jongleurtonia! It was fun! A little confusing at times (lol) but fantastic nonetheless!
Janette, the Jongleur

deanna@delirious-rhapsody said...

hi! i came over from janette's blog. i saw the picture of you and your family in the three little bear heads and thought that i had a very similar picture of my family from the botanical gardens. then i look, and realize that you're from huntsville too! :) i hope your family was safe in this ridiculous weather today!

Mrs. Biscuit said...

What an awesome guest post! I am definitely going to go check out Janette's blog now! The uncle who touches her hair totally cracks me up! People do the oddest things!!

<3 MuffinLovesBiscuit

Mrs. Biscuit said...

Oh, and I LOVE the video! It's so cute and sweet and clever and of course, PERFECT!! =)

Victoria / Justice Pirate said...

ahh that would be horrible to hear "i might be barren" as a response. Oh goodness I can barely deal with my in-laws as it is, two sets though. ahh I never thought of that!!!!!

Janette said...

Ashleykins: Love how you labeled this "funny" !

Mrs. Biscuit:Seriously!Are uncles renowned for exhibiting strange behavior? lol

Victoria: I actually have never given that response to that question..but sometimes I want to...Just to spice things up a bit!

Janette, the Jongleur

Amylou said...

#2 Yes I have noticed this! I only have one single friend left that really values my advice even though I'm married. The rest prefer talking to someone single instead. Not sure I understand this. I used to always go to married ladies for advice when I was single.

#3 Love languages do exist! Janette we should chat about this. My relationship is very similar to yours in this dept.

#4 Amen.Amen.Amen. I can't tell you how many times my feelings have been hurt by those questions. Seem like people don't even care when they say it. Or you feel like you aren't interesting as a person because you don't have kids yet! I would encourage anyone to find a way to seem more interested in people and ask more genuine questions. Those questions can hurt sometimes.

Wonderful guest post Janette!
Can't wait to read Ashley's!

Natasha said...

Such a great post!! I hate the whole Married Species issue...now there's a "with kidlets" issue as well, which means you pretty much lose even more friends when you have kids (although you also gain some fabulous ones)

Natasha ~ Required2BeInspired

Dale said...

haha..Great post. I'm not married, but all of your tips about the reality of it will definitely help. The one about the questions you get asked must get annoying. :) Funny post.


daisymay aka Chantele said...

Lol you post made me laugh so much and nod my head lots! I have 2 sets of in-laws and that causes all sorts of havoc! I also get asked those questions all the time. We have been married almost a year now and everytime I see someone we havent seen for a while, the first bloody question is hows married life, I just say the same as unmarried life! Nothing changed for us as we had been together 5 years and living together 4 of them.

Daisy Dayz Home
Cross-Jones-Photography Home

Mimi said...

This is great and all sooooo true! The married species is so EXACTLY on point. I hate that, but what r u gonna do? Oh, and the questions r nonstop but I guess I got used to it, finally! Nice post...thanks for visiting!

Aesthetic Lounge

jamie-lee said...

Lol love the post - hehe uncle who likes to touch your hair when in close proximity? HA! amazing.

Another Day Another Outfit said...

The single friend thing is TOTALLY true! My single friends abandoned me after I got married. But I feel like it's similar to people with kids and people without, it just causes a divide because priorities are now different I guess. Great list!

Melissa: Write it in Lipstick said...

hahaha, I get that feeling too like am I not cool anymore because i'm married and now I'm even less cooler cause i got kids. hahaha

misc.alaina said...

Great post! I have had marriage on my mind a lot because my husband and I are celebrating 5 years of marriage this Friday. This post is taking me back to our newlywed days when we were still figuring things out!

Janette said...

Ashley you have such greatmazinnngggg readers! Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment bonnie lasses!!!! Glad you could all relate on some point or other... And Uncle Steve ain't so bad! I just put my hair up in a bun when I see him.... lol

Stephanie and Such said...

I lovet this! I am single, but always hate asking when people are going to have kids, because 1. its awkward and 2. its none of my business!!


S. said...

Great post!

/S / http:// mydarlingsolitude.blogspot.com

Lisa said...

Great post from the super lovely Janette! I will definitely think about all of those things before I say yes, ha ha!

Eva Marie said...

Super great post loved reading along!!!

Lynn {hearted girl} said...

blog swappin' awesomeness! can't wait to read yours on J's space too. love the vid preview, totally sets up a swell vibe for the following incredz.

super Lovey arctic puffin heave-ho of a kiss up there lades! the love is effervescent and glows well beyond my screen. 1st point taken and can't imagine the juggling you two do between all that fams jammin'. i only have Sean's folks and they are a ferry ride away so it helps ease the pressure of lack of visiting times. it can be a tough nugget to crack evenly.

yes! love languages, i know those too and appreciate the meaning. i'm the cuddle/touchy one and he's the fixer/acts of service dude, it works total, thank goodness.

first class post Janette, adore all the photos and the lessons. you rock as per yooj! xo ♥

Sarah said...

Haha, I totally enjoyed this post! I guess it's true, there's so many things that you've prolly heard before about getting married, but they don't make so much sense as to after experiencing it. Will definitely keep these in mind when I get married next time. ;) Loved the polaroid photos at the end - a nice wrap to the post. x

Haley K said...

Loved it all! The video was purely awesome :) And Janette's list was great! I actually caught my head nodding while reading it :) I loved the creative question she had to ask a new married couple..."What traditions have you started since your first day of wedded bliss?" LOVE IT :)

And I smiled when I read about how she loves their LIFE together :) "we are one"...amen sister! :)

I'm excited to go read your post Ash!

b. said...

i love this, it is very true! i am not married, but i am in a serious relationship (we live together and have joint everything) and these points all ring true - the only thing we dont get are the questions about kids!


Janette said...

Im wondering why my arm is so dark in the kissyface picture!!!!! LOL Look how light my face is in comparison!! Hilarious! ahhh! Anywho! Just wanted to say thank you all for reading my wedded post! Glad the nods were mutual!

Chrissy said...

Haha, what a great post! Love it! And agree, there is a difference between married and un-married couples and I feel uncool cuz I'm married and have a kid often...haha!
Happy Monday!